What happens before the abuse begins?
Pay attention to how he talks about women
Listen to what he says about women in general. Maybe he’s making comments about how women dress or about his female colleagues - these statements are indications of his general view of women.

Destruction and intimidation
Throwing and/or breaking (your) possessions are violent acts performed to frighten you. And don’t believe that he is unable to control his frustration – does he do that at work? Using threatening gestures or merely his physical size to intimidate you are other ways to make you watch your step/keep you frightened.

Jealousy
Be warned if he insists you take responsibility for his emotions. If you feel obliged to stay at home instead of going to a party or seeing you friends his needs control your behaviour and you run the risk of becoming isolated. It shouldn’t be your job to control his jealousy.

Complete control
Primarily the abuser tries to direct all situations, make decisions even if they concern her life and not his. He decides what to do and what to talk about. Gradually he takes more control and won’t allow her having her own opinion about anything and finally he dictates everything she does and thinks. At this point her options seem very limited and she finds it hard to see a way out. Isolation - There’s a pattern to this behaviour. He might be dropping her off at work and picking her up when she finishes. He allows her to work but preferably not full time – he likes her to spend more time at home. She’s not allowed to attend parties at work or meeting colleagues in her free time. She looses touch with her friends and family because the he won’t let her see them. He rarely goes right out and forbids her but by acting cold and standoffish he gets his point across.